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Mar. 11th, 2009 06:18 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
opera142We had a lovely run of 20-degree days, and I was like "Winter coat, I cast thee off! To Hell with ye damnable mittens and socks! Clogs and sneaker and other shoes of impratical natures come forth and rejoice with me for the snows are receding and the world is ours!"
Then lo, winter returned with all its butterscotchy and semi-turgid fury. O' Winter, thy name is Steph.
No moar omg!recapz, plz of Steph, Trips and Randy. WE. GET. IT. OKAY. Steph smells like daisies, Randy is a habitual kicker, and Trips' mouth says he loves Steph, but his eyes say he prefers the scantily clad young sons of co-workers.
For the first non-omg!recapz happenings of the night, Shawn "the other OTP wrecker" Michaels is in the ring. He has a microphone and a hankering for Taker. And, oh he lays it on thick. "I respect you," and "I'm rilly, rilly amazing," and "You ain't had a Wrestlemania experience until you've been with me." Taker 's all "I wasn't doing any non-conning with Matt anyway. Now watch this video of me punching fat dudes, and tell me if it gets you hot."
While I sulked, other stuff happened. Of note: Punk lost his IC title to JBL; Randy Orton has bad taste in furniture (flesh-colored sectional FTeeeeW);a lumberjill match in which the diva's wandered/stared blankly into space, and finally Chris Jericho vs. Kofi for a MitB spot.
Ric Flair shows up, and boy oh boy, but my pants do tingle at the thought of eye-for-eye type vengeance for the whipping of Superfly last week. Jerky's already half-naked. YAY! But, lamely, there is no full circle of homoerotic violence. Ric only smiles smugly.
Semi-turgid woooooooooooo! cocks.
Somewhere in there was Edge, Big Show, Vickie, and Cena. Cena is a blackmailing dickwad. Vickie is torn between lovers. Edge is outraged. Big Show hopes they can make the threesome thing work--- he's grown quite fond of post-coital pans of scalloped potatoes. Oh the trans fatty damage the 3 of them could do if united.
Surprise!Christian, and not surprising yet still pleasant Miz, Morrison, and Kane wrestle with a bunch of other folks. Lovely combination of flippy, disgruntled flippy, and plain, old disgruntled. Faces win as faces only can in throw together matches.
MainEvent is supposed to be Hunter Vs. The Young Sons of Co-workers. Except we all know with the Randy Orton's at home set-up, that it's Home Invasion time. Hunter rings the doorbell, then knocks the door open with sledgie. He's here to expose Randy's people-smuggling ring. There are random people milling around everywhere in Randy's joint. Hunter lurches through the house first-person shooter style. Don't Hit The Hostages. He doesn't hit Mrs.Randy when given the opportunity. He smashes up their ugly furniture every chance he gets. Good for him! (bonus detail, the Ortons and their many, many live-in guests enjoy snacking on oranges and Jim Beam).
Eventually, Hunter and sledgie find Young Randall and heaving and grunting and broken furniture follow (no. no one is fucked through the mattress), and police show up and Hunter sits in a cop car while Randy hits the fattest Sheriff upon the head.
Then lo, winter returned with all its butterscotchy and semi-turgid fury. O' Winter, thy name is Steph.
No moar omg!recapz, plz of Steph, Trips and Randy. WE. GET. IT. OKAY. Steph smells like daisies, Randy is a habitual kicker, and Trips' mouth says he loves Steph, but his eyes say he prefers the scantily clad young sons of co-workers.
For the first non-omg!recapz happenings of the night, Shawn "the other OTP wrecker" Michaels is in the ring. He has a microphone and a hankering for Taker. And, oh he lays it on thick. "I respect you," and "I'm rilly, rilly amazing," and "You ain't had a Wrestlemania experience until you've been with me." Taker 's all "I wasn't doing any non-conning with Matt anyway. Now watch this video of me punching fat dudes, and tell me if it gets you hot."
While I sulked, other stuff happened. Of note: Punk lost his IC title to JBL; Randy Orton has bad taste in furniture (flesh-colored sectional FTeeeeW);a lumberjill match in which the diva's wandered/stared blankly into space, and finally Chris Jericho vs. Kofi for a MitB spot.
Ric Flair shows up, and boy oh boy, but my pants do tingle at the thought of eye-for-eye type vengeance for the whipping of Superfly last week. Jerky's already half-naked. YAY! But, lamely, there is no full circle of homoerotic violence. Ric only smiles smugly.
Semi-turgid woooooooooooo! cocks.
Somewhere in there was Edge, Big Show, Vickie, and Cena. Cena is a blackmailing dickwad. Vickie is torn between lovers. Edge is outraged. Big Show hopes they can make the threesome thing work--- he's grown quite fond of post-coital pans of scalloped potatoes. Oh the trans fatty damage the 3 of them could do if united.
Surprise!Christian, and not surprising yet still pleasant Miz, Morrison, and Kane wrestle with a bunch of other folks. Lovely combination of flippy, disgruntled flippy, and plain, old disgruntled. Faces win as faces only can in throw together matches.
MainEvent is supposed to be Hunter Vs. The Young Sons of Co-workers. Except we all know with the Randy Orton's at home set-up, that it's Home Invasion time. Hunter rings the doorbell, then knocks the door open with sledgie. He's here to expose Randy's people-smuggling ring. There are random people milling around everywhere in Randy's joint. Hunter lurches through the house first-person shooter style. Don't Hit The Hostages. He doesn't hit Mrs.Randy when given the opportunity. He smashes up their ugly furniture every chance he gets. Good for him! (bonus detail, the Ortons and their many, many live-in guests enjoy snacking on oranges and Jim Beam).
Eventually, Hunter and sledgie find Young Randall and heaving and grunting and broken furniture follow (no. no one is fucked through the mattress), and police show up and Hunter sits in a cop car while Randy hits the fattest Sheriff upon the head.
