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UWF: Cowboy Bob comes out to the Bonanza theme. Sofaking pimp. He always has hat-hair, hat-perm really, throughout the match, and there's an Ace of Hearts on his big, red drawers. Moe said it's because his nickname is "Ace". OMG squigglepants.
His manager wears a Members Only jacket, and everyone, EVERYONE even the refs, sport luxurious mullets. Except Bob, you'll get his perm when you shave it from his cold, dead skull.
Louie Spicolli wrestles as "Cutiepie". Awesome. Srsly. Awesome twist on the usual "pretty boy" gimmick (besides the obvious twist that Louie wasn't hot at all... maybe he was 80's redneck hot, but I doubt it). Cutiepie. Nothing tough about that.
My new-to-me favorite is the racist heel: Col DeBeers. Old dude who's semi-in shape, has a sinister moustache and shows lots of asscrack. I wish the Precious would pick up some of those mad asscrack skillz.
WWE: I've avoiding wanking as long as I could, because it's the same complaint I always have. WHY MUST ALL MY PRECIOUII BE TEAMED WITH SHANNON F-WAD MOORE ALL THE TIME GEEZ. Now it's Akio's turn.
Sadly, I am beginning to really dig MVP. At first, it was just the girl in me responding to MVP incredible ability to make the "Mew! I am the sad-faced kitty with sadder eyes." face. But then MVP had to give one of the best promos of late. "Here on Smackdown, you got a whole lot of superstars. But they're all little stars, they twinkle, twinkle. I'm a big star, I shine!"
Is M. Hardy's new appendix done yet? Because I really miss him on my TV, and I'm looking forward to seeing his new shirts from Express. Randomly, back in the day, I had a pair of jeans from Express that had a fold down flap over the buttons and zippers so one could show off her tummy if she so desired while at concerts or art class. And because of that memory, I am dismissing logic and knowledge of current fashion, and assuming the Precious is going to show up at Wrestlemania wearing jeans pinned at the ankles, a shirt with shoulder pads and a bolo tie. Possibly mall hair too. While M. Hardy shopped, Shannon shoplifted socks with the Express logo on the toe and Mr. Kennedy and Shane said they were going to get an Orange Julius but really they followed some girl around until she met her mom in the bra section of Macy's. Shane wanted to go the giant comic book store on the 3rd floor, but Kennedy called it the Nerd Emporium and Shane was too embarrased to say anything more.
TNA: Moe's new mission in life is to get a swank jacket like TigerMask. StoneColdSharkBoy enrages him. His segments get the triple speed fast foward on the TivO. We argue over the knockouts. I'm pro ODB and Roxie and occasionally Talia. He likes Christy "muppethead" Hemme and Karen Angle. We both like Crystal. He failed to recognize Rain, which you know, there should only be one Raine in his life anyway.
His manager wears a Members Only jacket, and everyone, EVERYONE even the refs, sport luxurious mullets. Except Bob, you'll get his perm when you shave it from his cold, dead skull.
Louie Spicolli wrestles as "Cutiepie". Awesome. Srsly. Awesome twist on the usual "pretty boy" gimmick (besides the obvious twist that Louie wasn't hot at all... maybe he was 80's redneck hot, but I doubt it). Cutiepie. Nothing tough about that.
My new-to-me favorite is the racist heel: Col DeBeers. Old dude who's semi-in shape, has a sinister moustache and shows lots of asscrack. I wish the Precious would pick up some of those mad asscrack skillz.
WWE: I've avoiding wanking as long as I could, because it's the same complaint I always have. WHY MUST ALL MY PRECIOUII BE TEAMED WITH SHANNON F-WAD MOORE ALL THE TIME GEEZ. Now it's Akio's turn.
Sadly, I am beginning to really dig MVP. At first, it was just the girl in me responding to MVP incredible ability to make the "Mew! I am the sad-faced kitty with sadder eyes." face. But then MVP had to give one of the best promos of late. "Here on Smackdown, you got a whole lot of superstars. But they're all little stars, they twinkle, twinkle. I'm a big star, I shine!"
Is M. Hardy's new appendix done yet? Because I really miss him on my TV, and I'm looking forward to seeing his new shirts from Express. Randomly, back in the day, I had a pair of jeans from Express that had a fold down flap over the buttons and zippers so one could show off her tummy if she so desired while at concerts or art class. And because of that memory, I am dismissing logic and knowledge of current fashion, and assuming the Precious is going to show up at Wrestlemania wearing jeans pinned at the ankles, a shirt with shoulder pads and a bolo tie. Possibly mall hair too. While M. Hardy shopped, Shannon shoplifted socks with the Express logo on the toe and Mr. Kennedy and Shane said they were going to get an Orange Julius but really they followed some girl around until she met her mom in the bra section of Macy's. Shane wanted to go the giant comic book store on the 3rd floor, but Kennedy called it the Nerd Emporium and Shane was too embarrased to say anything more.
TNA: Moe's new mission in life is to get a swank jacket like TigerMask. StoneColdSharkBoy enrages him. His segments get the triple speed fast foward on the TivO. We argue over the knockouts. I'm pro ODB and Roxie and occasionally Talia. He likes Christy "muppethead" Hemme and Karen Angle. We both like Crystal. He failed to recognize Rain, which you know, there should only be one Raine in his life anyway.
