SD!

[opera142]

Moe on Edge: The Rated XXL superstar.
Opera on Moe: LAWL Ilu
Cat at us: STFU. I'm trying to shred this American Girl catalogue. *claws*
Us: Kitty!
Cat: I said silence!

Smackdown starts with Edge and Vickie recapping their most recent feast at Long John Silvers. CChicken planks are proof God loves us and wants Edge as champ. Edge claimed he loves going there with Vickie because she showed him the majesty of eating a Snickers while standing in line. It really does satisfy. Sometimes they eat another Snickers on the way home. That's also majestic.

Anyways, among on the food porn, a match which seals Jeff and Hunter's collective doom is made. They must fight in a tag team gauntlet until they drop from exhaustion. I'm on board because, well, sweaty wrestlers fighting the good fight while exhausted and beaten and humbled is my thing.

Plus, Moe and I have Spinach&Leek pizza. They could show a Batista Vs Mark Henry Vs Hogan Vs. Bob Holly in a winner gets a lap dance from Don West match, and my ass would still be parked on the sofa.

Though, because I am so wont to snark and complain. I don't really get the motivation for Jeff or HHH to actually put effort into the match. If they must lose, why not do it right away and avoid injury and exhaustion and stained ring attire?

The answer to that will have to wait. Michelle McCool's heel turn waits for no one and no thing! Post-jobbing, she stomps backstage and kicks Maria in the tummy. Carlito, Primo, Bella I and Bella II stand there, not helping. Thanks friends!

Hurricane shows up and it's clear he followed Edge's Butterscotch For Better Health regimen. Sadfaces.

Then... oh who cares 80% of the rest. I only want to type about the 20% of pure tinglepants. Jeff and Hunter slapfight for most of the gauntlet. That's right girls, pull some hair.

But then. OH SWEET EVERYTHING then. Not only is it surprise!Precious, not only is it surprise Precious who doesn't look horrible except for those pants, but it's surprise Precious who gets surprise!bondage from Koslov. Sweet Mother Russia. TIED UP AND SLAPPED AROUND. While I had Spinach&Leek Pizza. aldjflaksdjflkasdjfaskldfjasdklfjasdklfjalskddfjskladfjasldkfj. Yays.