opera142 | Guardians of the Galaxy

I wanted to like this. I really did. A chick screenwriter, supposedly funny, Chris Pratt. What's not to like?

Fridging. Chicks exists to heal men, including the grossest example of my new girlfriend is my new mommy EVER. Calling a powerful, ethical woman* a "green whore"-- especially in a movie that so gleefully celebrates the lead dude-bro's sleeping around. Prosthesis exist to be the butt jokes. Geddit.

A really slow plot... pretty much a cross-galaxy game of keep away. Not funny... though this is partially on me. Lots of laughter from other theater-goers, and the spot that had me laughing the loudest also had me laughing alone.

Lastly, the post-credits scene: Howard the Duck. I guess Mark and Mae's hand-baby had other commitments.

*A heroine who does the right thing even though it's personally dangerous