(no subject)

[opera142]

A Night of Close Calls With Head Injuries.

Opener was the Money in the Bank match. Less is more, and this thing was a mess. Cluttered, rushed, no storytelling or build. It didn't help that the match had been aired 75 times already. Coolest spot was Kofi climbing a ladder that someone was holding upright. Punk won, which I won't complain about, but I would've liked Christian winning.

Kid Rock. Meh. Though his dance-along with the divas was a clever way of getting around 25 entrances. The Pretty Lillian must have put her foot down. Sunny was there. Torrie Wilson. Victoria. MOLLY HOLLY OMG. And they didn't announce or focus on any of them until they were eliminated. THANKS FOR HARSHING MY MARK, STEPH. Santino in drag won.

Speaking of dragging, Jericho vs. the Legends was MEH. Steamboat surprized me, the rest sucked.

The Hardys next. I think. I'm going off memory here. Jeff has new boots. Purple ones. The Precious had a whole new ensemble. NO MORE SKULL PANTZ YAY. I almost complained about the moon boots and the key motif, but then the smarter half of my brain said, "Quiet you! He's in snug-fitting Spandex."

Yes, deliciously snug.

Rushed, weird match. Lackluster ending-- Matt with the Twist of Fate. Actually, all the finishers were pretty dullsville tonight.

Rey, dressed like the Joker, defeated JBL in 21 seconds. Afterwards, JBL quit. My money is on him announcing at SD next week. Tazz quit WAAAAAAAAAH.

Taker vs. Shawn Michaels started off bad. A cow vest, Shawn? Then he took it off, and the match picked up from there. Excellent action. One gruesome spot when Taker's legs hit the ropes during a dive, and Taker took a scary header. Lots of action, good back and forth. By far the best match of the night.

Sign: IF CENA WINS WE WANT A REFUND

Show and Edge and Cena dragged in comparision to Taker/Shawn. Cena's entrance involved a clone army. One Cena is more than enough. Cena almost did a double-FU with Edge and Big Show, but Edge fell off. Cena won, of course.

Stone Cold rode an ATV around and drank beer.

Triple H needs to cheat to win. I HATE WRESTLING MORALS. Stupid finisher.