Shannon Moore and a book review
That's enough, Shannon Moore. I don't know, okay. I have no idea which facial expression you exhibit while giving or not giving a fuck (though I imagine it's as slack-jawed and blank as all your other looks) so please cease your caterwaul of "DILLIGAF".
Book review:Odd Girl Out
Weeks after having read this, I'm still too aksdfjalskdjasldjf to review it beyond bullet points.
*I read this from a fannish perspective. Fandom is my main source of chick-sans-male interaction. Excuse the breaking of Snaky's Law here, but the unspoken social rules of fandom follow the ones discussed in OGO to a rather gross T.
* Odd Girl Out is not without flaws. The sole chapter on poor/non-white girls felt tacked on and inauthentic. The author, Rachel Simmon, assumes every girl has the same goal: popularity. And that popularity is one static notion. Both in r/l and in fandom, I think popularity is certainly coveted, but there are populations of girls who want to be popular because of something, being the best (fanwriter or artist) for example, rather than just generically popular.
(here is where I would wank about girls who have a hobby or interests are less likely to become trapped by girl-bullies because they aren't soley dependent on friends and relationships for their feelings of self-worth, but I'm trying to keep this short because lj attention spans are small and I have much asdfjlaksdjfkdsfskldfj to get through)
*the alternative aggression tactics girls use (shunning, two-facedness, ranking friendships) are appalling easy to use online. The concept of shunning, I feel, is an underlying reason why feedback or its lack is such a volatile issue. To not leave feedback is a potent double-whammy. Not only does the creative expression of a women get denied, but she, herself, gets denied. She is not even worthy of a duty feedback. Her friendship is one of low-standing. She is definitly not a "friend outside of fandom".
*Women tend to hide behind socially acceptable aggressions and blame the victim. I'm not about defend wank (or conveniently forget I like to point and laugh too), but a lot of wank starts because the wanker felt slighted and said something about it. Again, I realize that most wankers engage in enough additional poor behaviour to cancel any goodwill, but it's sort of sad to realize that buried in the mocking of a wanker's outrageous behaviour is a wee bit of additonal mocking that she went unglued and wanky while we were able to able to cram down our disappointments and "play nice" Out of all the terrible behaviour in fandom, only wanking has words: spechul snowflake, princess, etc to fling around. Just the idea of being accused of being a spechul snowflake is enough to keep women from speaking up.
Odd Girl Out talks a lot about women lacking training in expressing minor annoyances. Girls should be cheerful (but not annoyingly so) and willing (but not easy, you know). So we cram a lot of annoyances downdowndown, then explode either when we can't hold back or, more often, when we get a socially acceptable reason to do so. Along those lines, it's interesting to see how much dirt comes out once some one gets labeled as wanky. It's fun, sure. I'm in it as much as anyone. But, I think, at least some of the reason for that stuff suddenly surfacing is because it's okay, for the time being, to talk shit about someone. We don't have to play nice.
*OGO contains lists made by girls of the Ideal Girl and the anti-Girl, and it's startling how much of the anti-girl list is the stuff a woman can get lectured over in fandom. Anti-girls are professional. Think of all the posts that scream about Grammar Nazis and it's just for fun. Anti-girls are excessively cheerful (fanbratz, she's just in it for the squee) Anti-girls are opinionated. Wank ground zero, all the fandom!secrets about everyone liking X, but I like Y. Anti-girls are not skinny (Steph wears a size 12 jokes).
Book review:Odd Girl Out
Weeks after having read this, I'm still too aksdfjalskdjasldjf to review it beyond bullet points.
*I read this from a fannish perspective. Fandom is my main source of chick-sans-male interaction. Excuse the breaking of Snaky's Law here, but the unspoken social rules of fandom follow the ones discussed in OGO to a rather gross T.
* Odd Girl Out is not without flaws. The sole chapter on poor/non-white girls felt tacked on and inauthentic. The author, Rachel Simmon, assumes every girl has the same goal: popularity. And that popularity is one static notion. Both in r/l and in fandom, I think popularity is certainly coveted, but there are populations of girls who want to be popular because of something, being the best (fanwriter or artist) for example, rather than just generically popular.
(here is where I would wank about girls who have a hobby or interests are less likely to become trapped by girl-bullies because they aren't soley dependent on friends and relationships for their feelings of self-worth, but I'm trying to keep this short because lj attention spans are small and I have much asdfjlaksdjfkdsfskldfj to get through)
*the alternative aggression tactics girls use (shunning, two-facedness, ranking friendships) are appalling easy to use online. The concept of shunning, I feel, is an underlying reason why feedback or its lack is such a volatile issue. To not leave feedback is a potent double-whammy. Not only does the creative expression of a women get denied, but she, herself, gets denied. She is not even worthy of a duty feedback. Her friendship is one of low-standing. She is definitly not a "friend outside of fandom".
*Women tend to hide behind socially acceptable aggressions and blame the victim. I'm not about defend wank (or conveniently forget I like to point and laugh too), but a lot of wank starts because the wanker felt slighted and said something about it. Again, I realize that most wankers engage in enough additional poor behaviour to cancel any goodwill, but it's sort of sad to realize that buried in the mocking of a wanker's outrageous behaviour is a wee bit of additonal mocking that she went unglued and wanky while we were able to able to cram down our disappointments and "play nice" Out of all the terrible behaviour in fandom, only wanking has words: spechul snowflake, princess, etc to fling around. Just the idea of being accused of being a spechul snowflake is enough to keep women from speaking up.
Odd Girl Out talks a lot about women lacking training in expressing minor annoyances. Girls should be cheerful (but not annoyingly so) and willing (but not easy, you know). So we cram a lot of annoyances downdowndown, then explode either when we can't hold back or, more often, when we get a socially acceptable reason to do so. Along those lines, it's interesting to see how much dirt comes out once some one gets labeled as wanky. It's fun, sure. I'm in it as much as anyone. But, I think, at least some of the reason for that stuff suddenly surfacing is because it's okay, for the time being, to talk shit about someone. We don't have to play nice.
*OGO contains lists made by girls of the Ideal Girl and the anti-Girl, and it's startling how much of the anti-girl list is the stuff a woman can get lectured over in fandom. Anti-girls are professional. Think of all the posts that scream about Grammar Nazis and it's just for fun. Anti-girls are excessively cheerful (fanbratz, she's just in it for the squee) Anti-girls are opinionated. Wank ground zero, all the fandom!secrets about everyone liking X, but I like Y. Anti-girls are not skinny (Steph wears a size 12 jokes).