opera142: (bleach)
Hey Record Companies/iTunes

I wouldn't have to
a)enter passwords
b)answer 2729874298 "security questions"
c)get bombarded with ads for shit I don't listen to
d)wait for a slower-than-everything site to load

if I were to steal music. Just sayin'

SD

Mar. 18th, 2011 10:06 pm
opera142: (this shit is bananas)
My interest in Smackdown is at an all-time low. Starting the show off with Edge does nothing to resolve this.

Sign: Edge. Rated X Superstar.

Try Rated-R Superstar. Geez. IF ONLY THE CATCHPHRASE RHYMED THEN IT WOULD EASY TO REMEMBER. Also, if you're fan enough to spend the tedious, ink-stained hours necessary to letter a sign, then shouldn't you be fan enough to know the correct wording of the catchphrase. GEEZ.

Luckily, though it's a Brodus Clay match (MOAR NOT HELPING), Alberto Del Rio's butler skulks out to aid and abet most sullenly. The boy has elevated looking askance to an art form. A scowling, untrustworthy art form.

Christian, recognizing that he bares 51%* of my SD interest, rushes out to roll around with Alberto. Cheap Opera heat, but I appreciate the attempt. Teddy hustles out too, to announce a Christian/Aberto con butler match for later, lest I assume they are done for the night, and wander off to play Frontierville.

Kofi and Sheamus are next. I suppose I should blame the malaise, but I do not give a shit. Sheamus should be the villain I feel giddy over disliking. Musclebound, surly, alpha-male, over-pushed, and yet, MEH. Same with Kofi. I should be giddy over his plucky attitude, his sunny personality, his flippy-shit, his beautiful skin. YET MOAR MEH. I blame the writers. Smackdown doesn't have storylines anymore; it has premises. KOFI HAS LOST MATCHES LATELY. WILL HE LOSE MOAR? or SHEAMUS LOST MANY MATCHES WHEN HE USED TO WEAR THAT UGLY FELT CAPE AND PAPER CROWN BUT HE TOOK IT OFF AFTER SOMEONE FINALLY SAID SOMETHING. WILL HE WIN MOAR MATCHES?

Kane needs to get back to his roots. Got a pretty boy bothering you? Kidnap and bondage, pref. in a boiler room. Seriously, they don't come any prettier than Justin Gabriel these days. Pope did it on TNA last night. You one-upped them with Snookie, now do it with Pretty Boys in Peril. Do it.

Cody Rhodes. BORING. Sign: Dash me Cody. That verb doesn't mean what you are trying to imply. YOU HAVE LOST YOUR SIGN PRIVILEGES, WWE UNIVERSE. At least, Trent got some air time.

Kane told Big Show "You complete me.", and for a second, there was a flash of what wrestling could be: silly-fun and clever, creepy on its own terms, a wacky twisted view of the world.

The moment soon passed.

Shawn Michael's new segment This Mullet's Musings drones on and on about Taker and Triple H and Wrestlemania and other boring stuff.

Layla. Hi!

Oooh. Surprise Maryse and Teddy.

Christian in a cage. Standard fare until the end. Christian hugged his way to victory. But it was spoiled by Edge writing POOPY on Alberto's car.






* Christian - 51%
Alberto's Butler - 39%
Jericho's Not Butler and Justin Gabriel - 9%
Will Trent Baretta be on? - 1%
opera142: (Default)
Oh Wade Barrett. You've got Gabriel, Jericho, Dibiase, Punk and Morrison, yet you choose to pester Cena? Also, why has there been a total absence of tea, kinky/shaming costumes, and ever-dissatisfied fussiness? I DEMAND FUSSINESS.
opera142: (this shit is bananas)
John Cena's vision for the future includes robot butlers. Robot butlers. I say the Hell with that, and the Hell with John Cena.

-_____-

Feb. 27th, 2010 10:17 am
opera142: (bleach)
WWE cut Shane Helms, Paul Burchill and Maria. -____-

Maria, I sort of went hot-n-cold on, though she forever endeared herself to me by lifting that soldier above her head. Helms, I've heard, asked for his release so he could go to TNA and tag with Shannon ( I don't even know where to start wanking about that. HELMS NO. My pussbag characterization of you was done for petty, silly reasons. Life doesn't imitate art. Quit it. Jeez)

Burchill breaks my heart. Hunky, awesome moves, British accent, wore eyeliner. YUM.

If WWE needed to cut payroll in these difficult economic times of corporations getting massive tax breaks (of which WWE got something like 8 million dollars), then WWE should remember that their roster includes The Guy Who Looks Like Cena Got a Role in SoulManII, Shad Gaspar and Michelle McCool.
opera142: (bleach)
Tonight's weather report began with "60 hours of continuious snow..." Le sigh. I am so sick of coming home every night and shoveling in the dark. The heating bill makes me want to punch things.

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